Motherly Advice {When is the right time?}

New Weekly Post.

Since the moment Kaden and I thought we were ready to have a baby I decided to devote my time to figuring out how to be the best mom possible.

Right now it seems like everyone I know is pregnant, trying to get pregnant, or just having a baby. So I figured why not pass on a few of the things I've learned so far. I am definitely not an expert in any way, but why not share what I've learned?

I have carefully been considering what to start with for this post. It thought maybe breast feeding or staying healthy as a new mom. Instead I've decided to write about when the right time to have a baby is.

Nearly four years ago now Kaden and I were just married, living in a metal shop, and figuring out how to live with the opposite sex. At that point we swore we wouldn't have kids until we had been married for at least 2 years. We both knew we needed time to grow up, and strengthen our relationship. A year into our marriage we found ourselves jobless students living in a trailer. Around that time I was asked by my new doctor why I was on birth control. She said it would be hard enough for me to conceive with how often I was able to ovulate. I was in shock. I never considered that getting pregnant could be hard. Without a second thought I gave up my birth control and decided to leave it up to God to decide when we were meant to have a baby. Looking back now I realize how crazy that was. (We were so poor and just beginning to decide what we wanted to do with our lives). A few months later, after buying a house and finding a couple of low paying jobs we decided if we got pregnant soon it would be perfect for our plan.

It didn't take much for Kaden and I to know when the right time was. We pretty much just needed to realize we may not have time. Here are a few other things we felt like we needed to accomplish before having a baby.

We needed to
spend a lot of time together.
have a strong and loving marriage.
be in our own place.
And be financially stable.

Here is what didn't stop us from deciding we were ready,
we were both students (still are),
We didn't have insurance,
And we still both had low paying jobs.

One thing we heard a lot from people is that there is never a perfect time to have a baby. It's true in a way but I would rather say when you get pregnant is the perfect time. Deciding "when" is very personal and is different for everyone. It is a decision that should be made between you, your husband, and Heavenly Father. Kaden and I prayed every night to know "when" was best. Having a baby is one of the most spiritual things I have ever done and I encourage everyone to see it that way. I also encourage everyone to keep in mind that sometimes "when" isn't always up to us.

So to sum it up. You and your partner are the only ones who know when the right time to start trying to have a baby is. You and The Lord are the only ones who know whether or not you are capable of being parents. It's not a decision to be taken lightly, but with lots of prayer and contemplation  It is a decision that varies with everyone. Some people are ready as soon as they are married, some after they are finished with grad school and have a stable job, some people might be somewhere in between.

I'd love to hear what helped you decide when the right time was. So feel free to comment and follow.